Summer and Snakes
By: Dr. Jeff Fuller
We have wrapped up another school year, observed
awards programs and graduations, closed out a successful Relay for Life, hosted
a wonderful float along the famous Hacket Creek and got through May without any
bad weather conditions. That is the May
we have enjoyed in Coosa County. I would
have to say, “so far, so good.” Right?
Quickly we are heading into the summer season. A great deal of big things to do in the
summer months. Throughout the county
individuals will be dusting off the outdoor grills, planning vacations to the
beach, spending time on the lake, or sitting lazily on the porch swing. It is great to live in such a place, where
the pace can be adjusted to the seasons.
Of course here at Rockford, we have several upcoming
events which tend to speed up the pace.
Youth Camp will be the first week in June, with the last week being
Vacation Bible School. In July we will
host an event for couples and there is no getting around the plans for revival and
Back to Church Month in September.
With summer comes the crawling reptiles as they
slitter through our yards and the nearby woods.
Snakes come to life and present a ton of troubles. There have already been several sightings of
these creatures of God, with one potential snake bite on the Chilton County
side of Lake Mitchell. Needless to say
they are out in force, I do not like them, and they can hurt me-caused by
running away from them.
I have so many snake stories, and I am not sure
which ones I have told and the ones I have not told.
We use to have a family, the Owens Family, come sing
for us when I was back on the mountain.
This was actually Randy Owens mothers group, and they were of the
variety of believers who prided themselves in being called, “Snake Handlers.”
One Sunday afternoon, Mrs. Owens and the band came
to set up for the evening service. We
were talking about the services from that morning, comparing notes. We both agreed that our respective services
were well attended, spirit filled and the response to the message was
wonderful. But she lost me when she
started talking about the snakes being brought out.
“Brother Bill was a just winding down,” she said,
“when Deacon Goodman brought out the biggest, prettiest, longest rattler I’d
ever laid eyes on. I got in the spirit,
danced down the aisle and took it right out of Deacon Willy’s hands. I lifted it up, spoke over it and dropped it
to the floor.”
I refused to shake her hand or get anywhere close to
her.
I read a snake story recently that made me laugh
harder than I should admit.
The story is that a lady found a small snake
crawling across her floor as she came home from the grocery store. She dropped the bags in her tracks, and while
it was going under the couch, she screamed.
Her husband who was in the shower, came to her
rescue dripping wet and wrapped in a towel.
She told him what was happening and he got down on the floor and began
searching for the snake under the couch.
While he was down there, the little monster came
out, crawled along his leg and bit him on the ankle. His wife saw it happen and climbed on a
chair, while her husband banged his head on the coffee table attempting to get
up from the floor, thus causing him to black out.
A neighbor came over, found the wife in the chair,
and the husband unconscious on the floor, called 911 and told the dispatcher
that he was at the neighbor’s house, where the wife had killed her husband.
The police arrived first, attempted to get things
under control, but about the moment an officer calmed the wife down and started
his interview, the snake crawled out from under the recliner. As the little thing skittered along the edge
of the couch, the officer pulled his gun, shot at the slimy reptile, and hit
the man in the thigh.
The wife passed out, began to fall from the chair
and knocked herself unconscious, hitting the floor with a thud.
The Medics arrived, surveyed the scene and went to
the aid of the man first. They stopped
the bleeding, put him on a gurney and started toward the door leading to the
front porch. About that time the snake
crawled between the legs of the Medic at the head of the gurney, who fell
backwards trying to get away from the reptile.
He dropped the gurney and the husband tumbled to the floor.
About the time the Medic was trying to avoid the
snake and fall, causing the husband to roll from the gurney, the wife passed
out again. As she fell her head made
contact with the end table and cut a gnash into her scalp.
The Medics reloaded the husband on one gurney and
the wife on another and headed toward the ambulance. The neighbor thinking he needed to get rid of
the snake, took his lighter from his pocket, set a piece of newspaper on fire
and began chasing the poor snake. In the
process of ridding the den and house of the snake, the curtains caught on fire,
and the fire department was called to the scene.
The fire department put out the fire which burned
the den and kitchen, smoked up the house, and caused considerable water damage
to the rest of the house.
Later that afternoon, the wife and husband returned
to the house. The husband had stiches in
his thigh and ankle, and a butterfly bandage on his head, and a sprained back;
the wife had a black eye, snitches in her head, and was sore from her falls.
As they stood, surveying the damage to the house,
the little snake crawled out from the rumble, eased along the wall as the two
adults looked on dumbfounded, and crawled through the open door and into the
wild.
The wife asked the husband, “Ready to get a pet?”
Until next time…
